I've blown a few things in my day
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize