Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
