Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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