Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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