come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize
