all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Randomize
