you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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