We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
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