I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Randomize
