Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize