this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
