We won't sleep together?
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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