just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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