I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
