dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
