Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I am full of burrito and curiosity
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
