what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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