You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
