The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize
