Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
