BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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