This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
There r osticjed everywhere
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
