yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
she looked like the before picture.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
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