fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize