Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize