I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
