Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I think I won the penis lottery.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
