I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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