You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize