just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
