Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
