Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
