Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Randomize
