I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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