She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
