Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
