even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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