whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
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