So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
