So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
