I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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