Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize