So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
