You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
i drank out of a bidet.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Randomize
