I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
