So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Randomize
