Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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