Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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