i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
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