you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
