a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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