Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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