Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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